Monday night Talks.

august 24, 2009

So I had a heart to heart with my mom and dad today. It was very revealing. I mean I have talked to my parents before but I never really analyzed what type of people they are, what their views are on life, and how they see things...I was always too busy worrying about myself, or wanting to be heard. 

My dad had some interesting things that he talked about. Like when I was talking about how I don't care about how much I get paid in my job, I really ultimately just want a job that I will wake up in the morning excited for. A job I won't dread. And he made a good point by saying that we make the job the job we dread...no matter what we do in life, how hard or how "boring" it is, its how we make of it. We choose to dread the job or to look forward to it. Or if other people complain about the job you are more likely to join in and then start believing it is a horrible job. He was like, we don't appreciate what we have, we all would rather sit here and complain about how hard life is, complain about what we don't have, complain about other people, when really we have everything we need and we are doing better than most. We all look and see the grass is greener on the other side, and its this vicious cycle, because we get to the other side and all we do is look back and go "hey I actually did enjoy that life, I actually was having a good time, I actually did have what I wanted and needed" then we just dwell in our regret. We tend to always look back and think wow I was happy, but at that time that we look back on we didn't realize we were happy, until its gone.

 I mean I know all of this has been said before and that all of this has been written about, but I have never heard my dad talk about things like this, and it makes it more significant hearing it from him. Probably because I don't often get to hear my dad just talk as if he doesn't know the answer, he wasn't trying to give me advice, or ask me about my day, or whatever, he was trying to figure life out just like I'm trying to figure out life...and I realized that I don't really humanize my parents...I mean I know they are humans duh but I forget they have dreams, that they aren't so sure of themselves either, they don't have all the answers...I really respect and love them for that, that they have done such a good job of parenting that I feel like they are all-knowing and unbeatable...and it makes talks like this that much more meaningful... It makes me feel safe, and not as scared, because if people like them can be unsure and can wonder about the same things that I'm confused about and that I am trying to figure out, I don't feel so stupid or lost or confused... 

It's nice to have someone older to talk to about things like this, people that have been there already been through high school and college, and to hear them say that even though people have changed, generations have changed, we all pretty much are the same, we all need and desire the same things..we all ponder life... we all make mistakes, even the best of us... and again I've heard these things before, I mean most of them are cliches...but to hear things like that, stories about their lives that prove that...it puts meaning to the words.